Monday, June 13, 2011


I haven't weighed this little since my last decade, i.e., my 30's!  I am thrilled beyond belief!  And, my god the journey has been so steady and effortless. I've lost just under a pound a week, and have even had trips where food was a major focus during this 5 1/2 months. I didn't deny myself a whole heckuva lot along the way.  I tasted everything I wanted to, and definitely overindulged at a few several course meal events.  But, other than those few occasions, I pretty much stayed the course.

Being perimenopausal, though, I had my fair share of weeks where I gained even though I knew I had synchronistically done more working out, etc.  But, my hormones didn't care about my weigh-ins.  Weight Watchers does a really delightful thing on their site, where you can see the chart of your weight loss in graph or list form.  I love the graph because I can watch the ups and downs, hills and valleys that lead me to this point.  It was very steady, ups roughly every four weeks, followed by a bigger down. 

On the up weeks, I won't lie, I still felt like I'd done something "wrong" or that I had accidentally not logged something, etc.    I had to keep remembering that if I just stick with it, the loss will continue.  My body will catch up.  It always did.

The biggest coup is that I did almost no emotional eating over these months, even though several weeks into my loss I broke up with my boyfriend.  Normally, this would have been a grand excuse to indulge.  In fact, I had gained half of the weight I just lost after my father died because my childish mantra was "I get to do anything I want!  My daddy died." 

I give full credit to Marianne Williamson's "Course in Weight Loss" for taking away all the childish mantras, and for teaching me how to truly take care of myself.  Also, I give her credit for this 20 pounds.  My original goal when I signed up for Weight Watchers on January 5th was 13 pounds.  Marianne's book really got me to see that that would have been my "as good as it gets over 40" weight, not my ideal weight.   I got that I have been denying myself my ideal weight since my 30's. 

The truth is I didn't want to do the work to unveil all the conversations in my head that were keeping me from my ideal weight.  "It's not safe -- bad things happen to me when I'm thin."  "I can't, it's too hard over 40."  "This is as good as it gets, Bridge!"  "This is good: keep some weight on so you have an excellent excuse for not having the man you want!"  If you are struggling in any way, shape or form with your weight, I recommend this book more than anything I've done on this journey.

My goal is 7 pounds more.  My Weight Watchers leader suggested just 2 more.  I'll be looking at this over the next few weeks to see where I land, but I will say I am very happy to say I am feeling great, liking what I see in the mirror for the first time in a very, very long time, and am very proud of myself.   I don't remember the last time I said I was proud of myself.  It's fun.

I will say, though, that this has been one Lazy Ass Weight Loss process because I did the full court press: body, mind and spirit.  I needed to deal with all of them to get these results, and I found the laziest solutions for me in all those area.  You need to find the tools that work for you.  But, I do recommend you hit all three areas to get to the bottom of all that is related to your not being your ideal weight -- or for not having whatever you want in your life that you don't have.

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous6:22 AM

    I'm proud of you too Bridge. Loving yourself and feeling safe...that's the key. xo fran