Tuesday, February 24, 2009

I booked a trip to London and Morocco today, and the only way it really worked was for me to fly on my birthday. And, since I'm flying on my birthday and I don't land until the next day, I am declaring that I don't age a year this year.

I know most women stick on 29 and celebrate "29 again" every year, but I'm just gonna stick on "46 again" but because I have a really hard time lying -- and because I always accidentally up my age anyway about 1/2 way through the year -- I think I'll just be "46 again" for a day or two. But what an appropriate place to live in suspended animation. London with jet lag. My body, mind and spirit will take a few days to hook up. It's all good.

Turns out a new colleague shares my birthday AND is synchronistically going to also be in London. Perhaps having a kindred spirit, albeit probably many years my junior, will yank me out of my state of suspended birthday animation.

Lazy aging is going with the flow, not against it...I'm sure the tide of 47 will sweep me gently into its British-accented arms.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

On the Oscars tonight during the memorial section I found out that someone I was friends with for a few years about 10 years ago, had died. Struck me hard because I hate losing touch with people. It was up to me to keep in touch with him, and I dropped the ball. I wish I hadn't. I wish I'd told him what a brilliant light he was in my life. Here's to director Claude Berri.

It makes me grateful for Facebook, which is definitely a Lazy Woman tool. You can be fairly passive and old friends come rushing in! Alternatively, when someone pops into your mind from the past you can quickly look them up and make a connection with grace and ease.

Here's to not losing touch with old friends....here's to Lazy Love Always in all ways.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

I'm traveling today. I have the travel thing down because I love to travel, and I am lucky to travel a lot. So, practice makes perfect. But I love to share tips with friends who I travel with or colleagues that I see on the road who seem to be lugging so much stuff with them.

No matter how many materials I need to bring with me, or how cold the destination I only take a carry-on. I can't bear waiting for luggage because I'm lazy AND impatient.

So, here are my Top Ten Lazy Woman Travel Tips to help give you a lazy break when you travel:

1. Pack all one color. You can pack a couple little (light weight) accent pieces if you want some color (scarf, tshirt, camisole), but packing one color makes everything more interchangable and easy.
2. Roll your clothes. Use tissue paper when rolling pants and blouses that can wrinkle. I literally never have to iron any piece of clothing. When I arrive, I unpack and hang things up, but sometimes I pack a whole day before I even leave on my trip, so I can attest that rolling really works. It also saves TONS of space and you'll fit a lot more in your bag. I promise!
3. Take an extra outfit. If I have two days of meetings, I take three outfits, because there is nothing more stressful than spilling, ripping, ruining something just before you leave the hotel. An extra couple items gives you peace of mind....priceless.
4. Make-Up - I have a miniature set of just the minimum make up that I need that is only for travel. I take ONE make-up remover cloth in a baggie, not the whole package. It stays moist in the baggie but can be re-wet with just a little water, if needed. That baggie I brought came in really handy today. I turned it inside out and put my leftover breakfast in it when I couldn't finish breakfast and realized I hadn't quite scheduled in lunch!
5. iPod -- I always bring mine for workouts or a little entertainment, but the cool thing about your iPod is that the headphones work on airplane audio jacks and fitness equipment audio jacks as well. So, you are set for all your travel audio needs!
6. Light Books/Kindle -- I'm not ready to move from paper to Kindle, but the Kindle is the ultimate Lazy Woman tool if you are a big reader. You can take tons of books in one lightweight device! I love books and I just keep the more lightweight ones for my travel reading, and leave the heavy hardbacks bedside.
7. Swimsuit - I only book hotels that have pools because for me taking a swim to start my day and end my day is the ultimate refresher/relaxer. I don't have a pool at home so it's a little travel treat that I book in. Plus swimsuits are super light. Lot of bang for your travel pound! If swimming isn't your thing, figure out what you can build in to your travel that is a treat that will make you feel taken care of when away from home.
8. Bubble Bath/Shower Gel -- All hotels give you soap and shampoo, but not everyone gives you really great bubble bath, so I always pack a little bit of my favorite shower gel which works as bubble bath, and can also be used as soap if the soap they give you isn't wonderful enough for your taste.
9. Phone Chargers -- I hear about people leaving their chargers in hotels all the time. Since most of us have bluetooth chargers as well now, you need two plugs. To get the two plugs and avoid accidentally leaving them behind, plug your chargers into the bathroom outlet near your toiletries, so when you pack up, it's all right in front of you, instead of blending into the carpet or desk top.
10. GPS/Directions -- My GPS device (Tom-Tom) is so lightweight and the charger for it matches my phone's car charger, that it's a no brainer to bring it on my trips. BUT, sometimes, it takes a while to kick in, or if overcast, it takes even longer sometimes. So, before I leave on trips, I print out directions for everywhere that I know I'm going just in case, and for me, it's the peace of mind factor -- having it just has me know I won't be ever completely lost. The coolest thing is that my GPS, like most of them, have the ability to let you search for restaurants, shops, gas, etc. in the area, on your route, etc. So, you don't have to stop and ask where the nearest Starbucks is...for instance...(the coffeeholic says)....

Happy Lazy Day to You!

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Major epiphany: Lazy Woman Dating for Bridget does NOT equal match.com.

So, I'm cutting myself from even looking at match.com for one week. I'm abstaining from the sea of faces and profiles who apparently match me. My name is Bridget and I'm a matchaholic. I'm actually NOT a matchaholic, but I do get overly excited when I exchange emails with particularly brilliant, funny, gorgeous men. I get hopeful. I think "Wow someone who gets me, and who shares my sense of humor, my love of sunsets and walks on the beach." And, then when they turn out to be unavailable or wacko or, much worse, not as interested as I am in them, well then I get really disappointed.

And, as I said in yesterday's blog, Lazy Dating should be FUN! So, I am now declaring myself "OPEN FOR FUN" ...if I could hang a sign on my front awning, aka my forehead I would.

A Lazy Woman lets love come to her. In the meantime she has fun.

Monday, February 16, 2009

I just saw "He's Just Not That Into You" and I realized I am the most unlazy dater on the planet. I am like all the characters in the movie rolled into one, fretting about this or that, about this and that, and then some more. It's truly ridiculous. I blame match.com. It's more fun to blame my unlaziness on a website that claims to have someone for everyone and yet keeps doling out stalker freaks and/or people who just are simply not that into me.

I wrote the "Dating" chapter on our book and when I wrote it I was a far lazier dater. I got un-lazy over the years. As a dater, I now feel like someone who is struggling to get out of a big bowl of heavy pudding, not really sinking, but feeling like I'm going to sink at any moment. Of course, it's chocolate pudding, because everyone knows chocolate eases dating woes.

I've cancelled my membership on match.com but it doesn't expire until April, so I'm stuck sucking the value of what is left. I can't throw away a 1/2 empty anything. Every day I think "this will be the day that the guy who really gets me joins!" Instead the resounding mantra of the masses of men on match.com is "We're just not that into you."

I'm going out of town for business for a few days. If I were a truly lazy dater I'd hit the hip hotel bar at night... Instead, here's what I'll do, I'll have a fun flirt with at least one guy at the fitness center and/or pool. Because I still do believe that the secret to Lazy Dating is fun, and the fun has been sucked out of dating for me lately. I need to do some CPR on Lazy Dating.

CPR -- compression to the heart, breath, breath, breath.....

Here's to the guy who coulda woulda shoulda written the "Lazy Man's Guide to Just About Everything" walkin' into my life before I pass out from doing the CPR!

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Happy Birthday Dad!

It's my dad's birthday and he just got back from 24 hours at the hospital. Ferocious nose bleed that, as far as I'm concerned, wasn't diagnosed.

So, he spent Valentine's Day in the hospital and basically got up on his birthday really early to leave the hospital. I said "What a way to spend to your birthday, eh?"

He said "We can't plan our calamities."

I am so grateful to my Dad for hundreds of things, but this quote says it all: he was the #1 bestower of Lazy Wisdom in my life.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Happy Lazy V-Day!

Starbucks had a long line this morning...I guess love brings out the coffee-lover in everyone. I thought I'd kill a few minutes visiting my favorite gift store next door and luckily came upon a lovely set of butterfly soaps, which reminded me of a special anniversary that also lands on this day.

I was obsessed with butterflies from a very young age. So, when I went with my friend Beanie when we were about 12 years old, to her grandparents beach house that was filled with butterflies, I instantly fell in love with her grandma. Today, Beanie's grandma, Adelaide, is my favorite movie buddy. We go to movies in the early afternoons and we have lunch and nice chats before we go.

A couple weeks ago we went to see "Slumdog Millionaire." She hated it, I loved it, and none of that is even slightly important because the most important thing that happened that day --- which is, frankly, the most important thing that happens every time we spend the day together is that she shares Lazy Wisdom with me.

This day, I got a Lazy Love Lesson from Adelaide. She was talking about the day her husband, Alec, died oh-so-elegantly-and-peacefully in his sleep. We have maybe only talked about that day one other time. She recounted that he had been not feeling quite himself the night before, had resisted taking his evening meds, and just wasn't his regular ol' brilliantly elegant, Cary Grant-ish self. When she got up in the morning she thought he was still sleeping and then a few minutes later she realized something was amiss, went over to him and found his body cold. She said her very first reaction was joy, near ecstasy that he had left this world so beautifully -- in his inimitable way. (He really was the most elegant man that many of us have ever met.)

Adelaide cried while she remembered that morning. She rarely cries. It wasn't uncomfortable tears, it was just tears of love, pure love. She said "Of course I miss him but I never wish for him back. I don't want the 86 year old Alec back, maybe the 20, 30, 40 year old... but I would never wish for him to be back for me." She added this lesson: "Never be sad when someone dies. You can miss them, but you have to let them go. Never wish for someone to come back, let them go and celebrate that they are somewhere better."

Today is Valentine's Day, the anniversary of Adelaide's husband's death. I know she thinks of him every Valentine's Day, and I know she follows her own advice and celebrates him wherever he may be.

Here's to loving and celebrating our loved ones...wherever they may be.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Valentine's Eve!

We delivered the Love Scarves today...it was the most heart-warming Valentine's happening ever. The patients were so grateful, and some we hear smiled for the first time in a long time. We met a young woman who lives in Minneapolis who has 9 month old twins. She, like a lot of the patients at City of Hope are so far away from their families.

It was one of the most heart-warming days I've ever had. It wasn't an easy day but it was so moving. There were lots of smiles and laughs too, one of which happened in the car ride home with my friend Nina, whose Volvo wagon proved most appropriate transportation mode for the big baskets of scarves.

We were talking about the topic of the week: LOVE. Nina has known me since college and was saying how she felt for me being on the dating scene. Then she said the most hilarious thing "I did the Lazy Love thing...I married someone I met in college...how lazy of me!"

They have the coolest marriage, so that proves it: Lazy Love is the best! Can't marry my college sweetheart because he's unbelievably, exquisitely happily married, but I shall find my version of Lazy Love!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Spent the evening making tags and putting them on the ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY FIVE scarves and hats that came in for the Love Scarf Project. Delivery happens tomorrow at 11 a.m. so tonight was the final delivery evening with friends dropping by with their deliveries. My house was aglow with love...a glow that makes all the lights seem brighter, makes everything look clean and shiny, and just makes even the coldest night seem warm, warm, warm. Wow oh wow love is good.

It comes in so many forms. And, on Valentine's Eve Ever....just for now... romantic love for me is just a source of entertaining stories for my friends!!!

Love Love Love Lazy Love

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

On the Lazy Love scene...My day started with my friend Allison (a man...it's an old English name) thinks I should give the guy who has two kids another shot. He really does seem great, but I would be third on his list: kids, career and then me... Allison has a new baby and a toddler so he's fully enamored with fatherhood and thinks it's the greatest thing since sliced bread. I've never really wanted to have kids, was never sure, and am happy that I don't have them.

Because I don't have kids I can do things like organize projects that give in different ways like the Love Scarf Project. I am the person who SHOULD be organizing projects like this. I do it well and I can do it the Lazy Way, i.e., it doesn't stress me out, it gives me a whole lot of joy. With kids, I'm sure I wouldn't have the time or energy to do things like this, so I am grateful.

I also get a lot of love from these projects. Tonight three women came over with bags full of scarves and hats they had knit. One woman, Dawn, knit her very first scarf for this project, and she did it with so much love. The other two women are awe-inspiring expert knitters who knitted with just as much love, and remembering people they had lost to cancer. The love was palpable. I hope the patients who get their scarves and hats can feel even the tiniest inkling of the love that I felt in my home tonight from these women.

Knitting for others is such a feel-good activity. You think of the person you are knitting for while you create their gift, which makes you feel good. It's relaxing -- even for me, and I am a total and utter dweeb with knitting needles --- and it's heart-warming. I think the Lazy answer to battling economic woes is to go and get some cheap yarn on sale and knit something for someone less fortunate than ourselves.

In this Valentine Time, I say love is a really wonderful lazy way to to get happy.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

I am doing a little project right now -- The Love Scarf Project -- where I'm gathering hand-knitted scarves and hats for patients at the City of Hope. (You can check it out at lovescarf.blogspot.com) Tonight I had to pick up a very beautiful crocheted hat from a friend of a friend. You gotta love life because there really are no mistakes...synchronicities abound in the most beautiful of ways. This friend of a friend is a kindred spirit, a Lazy sister of sorts. Shannen is my age - 46, and also has never been married. And she's amazing and beautiful and a real catch! And, she has a great Lazy attitude toward finding love, which I needed a serious dose of today. She's just living life to the fullest and letting love come to her, expecting it to shimmy up to her side and say "hey I want you." And, I know it will because she has such a stellar, magnetic attitude. I am so grateful to my friend Sa for introducing us. She was just what the love doctor ordered! And, now I have a buddy to go out on the town with ... it's very Lazy to go out with magnetic women!

Just this morning, I was bemoaning the fact that I can't catch a break with my online dating exploits. I've been giving it the ol' college try and whining to myself (and then to a friend on the phone when my own listening skills didn't prove good enough): "Why for the love of god am I not getting what I want." I heard myself whining like a child, having an adult tantrum. I was embarassing myself, even though I was alone in my kitchen. I looked down at my feet to make sure they weren't stomping. Then I called a friend, let it all out, and with her help, committed to getting back on the love court to throw some more balls, and have FUN! My god if the road to love isn't fun, get off the road.

I just take myself and my pursuits so seriously sometimes. Being goal oriented is great, but throwing a little Lazy into the equation is a good idea. The Lazy I need to throw into my dating life is FUN. I need to let go of my attachment to the results, and just go out with Shannen and have some fun!

NOTE: An email popped into my box after I wrote that paragraph. An old friend asking me out on a date with the priceless last line: "You're such a hot lazy girl..."

Can we talk about SYNCHRONICITIES? And, can we talk about the instant results we get when we let go of expectations, a genuinely Lazy pursuit by the way!

Stay tuned for more Lazy Love news...and don't worry I'm going to give you the cheap, easy, unbelievably Lazy secret to gorgeous, youthful skin....when the mood strikes me!

love love love to you all,


Monday, February 09, 2009

As is only possible with a true Lazy Woman, it has taken six years to get this blog going! Finally, after being asked to do this repeatedly, the wonderful synchronicity of having three people ask in one week, I realized the gods may be whispering in my ear...or hitting me over the head with a frying pan.

I'm going to invite my Lazy Woman cohort, co-author, Judie O'Neill to join in on the fun too. Hopefully you'll have plenty of Lazy Wisdom to entertain you.

First tip will be the absolute tip of the year: the absolute Lazy Woman Solution for skincare -- it's cheap and it's unbelievably easy and it came from my grandma....so stay tuned!